Oh For Some Red Patent Leather Pumps To Go With This Autographed MAGA Cap, Chapter 50, Verse 3

You think he’d be embarrassed, but no. He’d say, “It’s great to be in Idaho.”

“Sir, you’re in Iowa.”

“No need to sow division,” he’d say, as if he didn’t start it by stealing the election. How do you like the nerve of that guy?

He does this all the time. He was in New Hampshire, “It’s great to be in Maine today.”

“Sir, you’re in New Hampshire.”

“So what?” he said, “It’s still America.”

The worst was when he was in New York and he said it’s great to be back in Florida. Joe’s never been to Florida. Hell, he hardly looks awake half the time. There were no palm trees, no alligators, no big anadarko snakes. There was no great golf course like my great classic course at Doral. There was no nothing.

“Great to be back in Florida,” he does it all the time. I’ve never done it yet. I always know where I am even when it looks like I don’t have a clue. It’s part of my element of surprise, which should be on that elementary period chart.

I’ve never done it, with all of the millions of great speeches I’ve made all over Alabama and abroad. I was just saying, because I said Alabama.

That made me remember when I saved you from that hurricane by updating the code of eternity on Noah’s arc map and getting you the warning they didn’t want you to know, because they don’t like Alabama like I do.

But I know exactly, I didn’t have to think about it. It’s called Alabama. Sweet home Alabama. I love Alabama. I’ve always loved Alabama. Jeff Sessions, I could do without, but Mo. Mo is the pro we need to help push my agenda through to the finish line.