Let’s Just Change It From “The Star-Spangled Banana” To “Dick Around”

Sure, our current anthem is based on an old English drinking song, but it no longer evokes the grandiloquence of the supply side plantation economy & community police state whose freedumbocracy we’ve gleefully endured for the 40 years since Americans of all shapes, plus sizes, & colors embraced a blithering One Minute President who promised to protect us from welfare queens & killer trees.

Now, more than ever, we need an anthem to bring us all together, as we dick around with our ongoing global extinction event.

Don’t thank me. It’s what pataphysicians do, providing the best in imaginary solutions to the imaginary problems that make poopadoodle such a difficult to remove stain on everyday reality.