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Miami Dade Police Deny Deal With Turdwaffle To Sell Insurrectionist Swag
Feb 16, 2022
It Was A Blessed Inconvenience Cops Say
An alleged typo on an informational flier given to law-breaking motorists on how to resolve their citations online sent motorists near Mar-a-Lago in South Trumpistan to a website selling 2022-2024 merchandise promoting former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator & failed führer Donald J. Turdwaffle, who is anxiously awaiting reinstatement to avoid all accountability for his disastrous coup attempt on January 6, 2021.
While rational people may find it odd that the only agency with the web address typo was located conveniently close to Turdwaffle’s current White House in exile, Fucked News calls the entire kerfuffle “another Democrat attempt to deflect attention from the growing scandal over Hillary Clinton’s e-mails.”
Court officials say the flier originally sent to Miami-Dade police last spring contained the correct web address, but Miami Beach produced its own version of the notice using Winning Team Publishing, the same company responsible for Turdwffle’s highly forgettable picture book for uneducated Repugnicunts called “Our Jurney Together.”
Winning Team Publishing owner and co-founder Donald J. Turdwaffle, Jr. called the typo an “unfortunate mistake made by an affirmative action intern we were forced to hire & have already fired,” dismissing suggestions that the mistake was an intentional attempt to continue the Turdwaffle long con until the planet is no longer fit for human habitation as “complete covfefe.”