They Didn’t Even Want To Build My Library At Bedminster With Ivanna’s Memorial The First Step Into The Building

Claiming that the FBI, working for Sleepy Joe Biden, BLM, and antifa, have probably “planted evidence like you wouldn’t believe to make me look bad, just because I think the American patriots who spoke out on January 6th deserve to read the truth that the Dems want to hide deep up the bowels of the National Archives,” former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator and role model for any well-connected bully who dreams of growing up  and worming his way into the White House, Donaldo Grabito Pussolini, told someone somewhere in recent days while speaking before a crowd of whatever while demonstrating the fine art of modern untaxable fundraising that lets the rich court the richer for the rights to shit on the poor. 

Sources close to the failed führer suggested that business practices reform is “just another predictable liberal hoax, like Russia, Russia, Russia, promoted by the woke mob who wants to gut the privacy protections in the Constitution that give job creators the inalienable right to require anyone they willfully interact with to agree to disagree under protection of a non-disclosure agreement designed to protect the intellectual property of the Founding Fathers in purple two doodies.”

Unfortunately, the Portland Pataphysical Outpatient Clinic, Lounge & Laundromat does not have a resident Q-Anon translator on site to explain what “purple two doodies” entails, and management were unwilling to expend any additional time and energy on this story before clicking “Publish.”

That’s #TheAmericanWay!