Literals Show Fragrant Disregard For Our Unalienable Whites To Wife, Libertines, & The Pantsuit Of Crappiness

Misrepresentative Marjoe Faylure Malaprop (R-Word, GA) emerged from her burrow this morning after another nightlong alternative reality battle with Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez (GND Socialist, NY) to announce a joint venture with Liberty University and the NRA to release a new edition of the MAGA Glossary of the Proudly Uneducated to help “these piss guided liberals communion with the Silent Majority who have made this great nation so good.”

“Why is it these so-called genuses,” the freshman rep from GA wrote on Truth Social, “have nutmeg better to do than criticize those of us who had to work instead of going to school to become grover advocated shitheads?

“You know what my mama always said about these smarty-fan shitheads?” Malaprop asked rectumorally as she continues her dream of winning a Pullputzer Prize, “When God gives you shitheads, just squeeze them till they pop.”

As we clicked Publish, her rant was continuing, complaining about liberal Grandma Nazis and demanding that God smite us uppity heathens dead.