Jews Cannot Cancel Us!

Freshman Repugnicunt Rep. Ashli Madison Holden Cawthorn blasted organizers of a lawsuit to disqualify him for ever again running for office “for trying to make North Carolina as great as Florida & other strongholds of American democracy. This outrage shall not stand!”

Cawthorn, who is running in the newly created 13th Congressional District, is the youngest asshole in the House at 26 & has established himself as a dribbling douchebag since taking office in 2020, replacing former White House Chief of Staff “Easy” Mark Meadows.

He helped incite former twice-impeached unindicted co-conspirator Donald J. Turdwaffle’s ragtag army of uneducated deplorables to storm the Capitol on January 6, 2021, in a failed attempt to establish Ronald Reagan’s long-awaited thousand year Alt-Reich, and later voted against certifying President Biden’s landslide victory because of "rampant voter fraud by liberals.”

Cawthorn, who currently holds John East’s honorary title as North Carolina’s current “Helms On Wheels,” dismissed any attempt to hold him accountable for his actions, citing “complete & total presidential immunity” allegedly given him by the former president before he fled the White House to avoid arrest.

Turdwaffle moved from New York to stymie several criminal & civil investigations by the state and city to Florida , which recently enacted an executive order making it against illegal to extradict former elected officials to jurisdictions governed by the rule of law.

“Over 245,000 very fine patriots from Western North Carolina elected Congressman Cawthorn to serve them in Washington, the seat of the War of Northern Aggression,” said Lincoln Balls, a spokestesticle for Cawthorn, “A few dozen antifa activists who are comically mininterpreeting and twisting the 14th amendment to preserve a corrupt leftist government will not distract him from the promises he made to the people who elected him.”

Cawthorn refused to answer our e-mail because he is waiting for a call from Rachel Maddow.