The Epic of KuklaM*A*S*H
Nobody's Ever Had Better Numbers
Oct 12, 2021
Who Knew Gil Gamesh Was Related To The King Of Nimrodia? Volume 2, Chapter 10, Verse 43
The numbers speak for themselves. All you have to do is listen & you can hear them. We had them going into the election. We had them on election night, such a great night when they were only counting the legal votes, when we were ahead even on the fake news stations. Those numbers said we won. We got 12 million more votes than in 2016.
I was told by the best pollsters in the world… Real pollsters, the kind you pay good money to get the kinds of results we got, not the phony pollsters that are used by certain of the fake news media…
I listen to the best pollsters. That’s why you love me, right? I listened to this gentleman who’s a great guy, actually. And I said, “How well do you know him?”
“Well.”
“Did he ever say anything bad about me?”
You know when they say bad things about me, I have a tendency not to endorse them, okay? I don’t like losers. Sometimes I endorse a loser because it’s better than a Democrat, right? Anything but a Democrat. Our country will be great when all of the damned Democrats are gone. But I said, “Did he ever say anything bad?”
We checked, and there was nothing bad. He hadn’t been too deep into politics, I guess. Otherwise, he probably would have. Everybody I know in politics is bad, except for your favorite president. You won’t let me let you down. I’m always counting on you.
But he didn’t say anything bad. I said, “You know what? I’ll endorse him.” So I endorse Mo Brooks, because he never lied to me like the others did.
They all said that if I got 1 million more votes than 2016 I couldn’t lose. I got 12 million more votes, and we lost.
How is that fair?